30 Jan 2024
Looking for a Context
What do spirituality, faith and a life of larger meaning look like without the framework of an established religion? After seventeen years in an established religion - including five years, in which I finished a theology degree - I became an atheist and thought that this part of my life was over. How could you be spiritual without a “god”? I wandered through life considering possiblities. I would come across something new and look into it, only to find more deities of one sort or another. Buddhism was a contender, as no deity was required. Still, I felt that I had to pick something, or nothing. This was my biggest issue.
Understanding Spirituality
There is no requirement to CHOOSE anything. This is one of the moments of awakening. You do not have to follow anyone, any church, any creed, any manifesto. The truth is inside of you, as it has always been. You sense the divine, but are not able to verbalise what you are experiencing.
Moments of Clarity
I had many moments of clarity - from knowing it was wrong to give my infant son his first spoonful of baby food including pork, to knowing that it is wrong to attempt to “convert” others to creeds - there have been many times in which my spirit knew the answer. There was no need for outside intervention. I just needed to trust myself.
Finding the Path
How do we find and focus upon the path? If we don’t have instructions from others, how will we progress in our journey? People often like to be told what to do, told what is next. The reality is that such instructions will never take you down your path, as this path is YOURS. You will have to explore many dead end paths and work your way back to the main path again. You will have to learn the signs of the path for you. Ultimately, no one can take the path for you and no one else has a map for you.
My Experience
My experiences won’t give you a road map, but perhaps they will do all we can really do for each other in spiritual exploration - provide encouragement and examples (both good and bad). I believed I needed an established course (religion), yet I admired the mystics in my own religion, who refused to follow everyone else. This deep and abiding respect was my own spirit suggesting the path. I read the religious text for my group many times - hundreds - so when I went to a religious meeting, I found my own spiritual growth inhibited by the conversations taking place. Some might have suggested that my role was to help others in such a context, but putting a university student in a primary school class does not help the primary school students and only discourages the university student. My path was not meant to be along this course. My path, as all spiritual development beyond a certain point, is a solitary one. Just as we all die alone, we all develop spiritually beyond the most rudimentary level alone.
Explore
Explore your own path! Listen to your own inner voice - it is telling you the next step. Have faith in yourself - you cannot have faith in anything else without first trusting of yourself.
Aroha nui,
Lee Sturgis
leesturgis.eth
Support my Writing
If you would like to support my writing you can do so at the following Web3 addresses:
leesturgis.eth
leesturgis.sol
