03 Feb 2024
Our Ride Yesterday
Nietzsche, Tracy and I like to go on an evening bike ride. For Nietzsche, it is almost a requirement, as he is a German Shorthaired Pointer and has more energy than any other dog with whom I have lived. Nietzsche loves to run next to my bike and I have to make an effort, at times, to keep up with his energy. We were riding/running yesterday evening and almost to our turn around point, when an unleashed dog came running towards us, barking and growling. There was no human companion in sight. Nietzsche is on a stretchy lead next to my bike and when we see a dog at a distance, we generally just speed up a bit so the dog never catches us.
This situation was different. The dog was running at an angle to reach us and appeared very vicious - I was a paperboy for years as a child and know well the difference between a dog that barks as you pass and one that wants to get to you. I realised that this dog would reach Nietzsche and Nietzsche would be at a huge disadvantage with his back to the dog. So, I started to apply my brakes so that Nietzsche could turn around to face the dog. As I began to apply the brakes, Nietzsche kept running. He is a powerful 13 month old GSP and the effect was that he pulled the back side of the bike along with him. This twisted the bike, causing me to fall off, hitting the back of my head very strongly on the road.
Wear a Helmet
I have always been a supporter of bike helmets, but at that moment - when I had forgotten I had a helmet on and I hit to road - I imagined that my brains were all over the road and when I realised that they weren’t I began to celebrate the people who had created helmets! As I came back to my senses on my back, I realised that I had to get off the road. I began to turn over, noticing that part of my helmet had broken off.
Nietzsche Yelling Out in Fear
I then heard Nietzsche screaming as if the other dog was killing him. I turned over to see, instead, that Nietzshe was running terrified down the road, with the bicycle bouncing along on its side after him. It took some effort to finally catch Nietzsche and the bike, only finally catching up as they bounced off the road. I calmed Nietzsche and then looked at my bike - the back tyre was blown out and there was all sorts of broken gear on the bike.
I then turned to look for the other dog. A man had put him in the back of the car and was getting ready to back out of the carpark. I knew that I had to say something. A dog like that off lead is very dangerous and when that dog acted again in such a manner, I would feel at least partially responsible for not talking to the human companion of the dog.
Attempting to Communicate With Compassion
I walked my bike and Nietzsche up to the car. The man got out, yelling that he was deaf. I spoke slowly and (hopefully) in a way that he could understand. I was not upset, but simply wanted to relate what had happened. Once he understood (he seemed to understand well enough when he wanted), he said I was an “idiot” for having my dog run next to my bike. I calmly continued to discuss what had happened. He then said that I must be of “some sort” if his dog wanted to attack. Once I realised that he wouldn’t discuss the matter reasonably, I began to walk away, pushing my broken bike with Nietzsche alongside. As a parting comment, he said, “God bless you!”
Walking Away From Conflict
I knew this would go nowhere and started down the road and he went the opposite direction. I began to discuss the matter with my wife and then about five minutes later, the man came back. He had dropped off the dog somewhere and offered to give me a lift with my bike (after once again telling me that somehow I must have deserved it if his dog chased us down the road to attack us). I would never get in a car with this sort of man, so I declined and turned back towards my wife. He started yelling, “What more do you want!”
Speaking Honestly
At this point, I had had enough and felt honesty was necessary. I said, “For you to stop being an asshole.” He replied with, “You said a bad word” and got in his car and drove off. I reflected on these events for the 40 minutes it took my wife to ride her bicycle home and come back with the car. I reflected on them into the evening.
This man had said, “God bless you!” He said it perhaps half a dozen times, interspersed with telling me I was an idiot, saying that I must have deserved what happened, etc. I had several minutes of insults, with blessings in the middle.
The Next Morning
This morning, I have woken up with a very sore hip and neck and have begun to compose this post while sitting in bed and drinking my coffee.
Spiritual Considerations
When I first saw the man, I noticed several things about him, not the least of which was the unusual yellow colour of his eyes, where most people’s would be white. It didn’t look like the yellow that might denote organ issues, but was like the colour of chicken skin that has been in the butcher’s too long. I imagined that his lifestyle was poor and that he was suffering. This gave me empathy for him and I attempted to communicate events clearly.
When I realised that the conversation was not going well, I stepped away. When he drove up to us the second time and began with the same comments, I stepped away - choosing to ignore the insults. I calmly stepped away twice from his insults, attempting to go on my way.
Finally, when it was obvious that he wouldn’t leave, I spoke honestly, and for this I felt instant peace.
Appearances of Religion
We have all experienced people who hide behind the trappings of religion. They use a few religious words and such, but it is obvious that these are a smokescreen. These sort of superficial people will be the first to claim injury when you break protocol. They might believe that it is OK to treat someone badly, but if a person uses a word they don’t like, they have become the victim. This is ridiculous.
Just for the record, I will state that I am a Dudeist and the use of profanity is in no way considered inappropriate in itself within Dudeism (if fact, it is in religious texts). From my own perspective, if it is used in every sentence, it often denotes an underlying sadness or anger, but its effective use is similar to any of the other words we have at our disposal. Words are sounds. We use them to convey intent, emotion and other things. The words in the abstract are meaningless.
Superficial Religion
If you think that a person using a word you don’t like makes them less spiritual than you, then this, my friend, is complete bullshit. Do you save lives? Do you reach out to others in empathy? Do you search for the divinity in the universe? Don’t be caught in the trap that the spiritual quest is the best clothing, the best appearances, the best words. These are superficial dead ends where people get trapped.
The least spiritual people I have ever known were at a religious university. They would wear coat and tie (or skirt) and feel like they were better than others. They would select their words carefully, but treat others terribly. This is nothing more than a violent illusion.
If you use “God bless you” as a way to speak down to another, to end a conversation in which you have a weak position, or to attempt to elevate yourself, you are completely missing the point of spirituality.
Open your heart - the rest will follow.
Aroha nui,
Lee Sturgis
leesturgis.eth
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